Snape's Fantasy
by harrypotterfangirl2010
Summary: Set in 1982, a year after James and Lily's death. Snape's fantasy about the life with Lily that he wanted. Don't own anything.


_1982_

Severus Snape let himself into the home he shared with his wife, Lily to be greeted by the familiar smells of home cooking. As a muggle-born, Lily still preferred to do her cooking without the aid of magic, and he might be biased, but Severus thought this added to the flavour. He stepped behind her and put his hands on her waist. "How's Harry?" he asked.

She leaned back against him. "Tetchy," she said. "He misses you. You should check on him before dinner." "Was he the only one who missed me?" Severus asked. He slid his hand down, groping her ass. She slapped him away playfully. "You're incorrigible," she complained. "Go and see to your son."

"Yes, boss," he said, getting in a quick grope before heading off to the nursery where his year-old son Harry was in his crib. His green eyes – his mother's eyes – lit up when he saw his father. "Hey, kiddo," he said, lifting the boy up and settling him on his hip. Harry reached up and grabbed a fistful of his father's hair. Severus laughed good-naturedly at it; there wasn't much his son could do that displeased him. "Your mum says you've been tetchy. You know that means I have to soothe her. Not that I mind but you needn't be so obnoxious." Harry just stared at his father in wide-eyed amusement. "But you mean well, don't you? You can't help being tetchy, between your mother and I, you've inherited quite a mind. You must be bored lying there all day. Just you wait until you're old enough to go to Hogwarts. You'll be in Slytherin for sure."

"I heard that, Sev," Lily called from the kitchen.

"Just because they didn't take _you_," he called back. "Your mum has some issues with Slytherin. Thinks they're bigots and snobs. But I wouldn't have married a muggle-born if that were true, would I have?"

"You can't deny that practically everyone who went bad was from there," Lily said from the door, leaning against the frame, taking in the scene of her husband and son so happy together. "Lucius Malfoy, for one. I never believed he was under the Imperious curse."

He smiled at her. She and Malfoy had taken an instant dislike to one another. Malfoy disliked and distrusted anyone who couldn't trace their magical lineage back at three four generations on either side, and Lily, in turn, despised anyone who treated her like she was beneath them for being a muggle-born. "Surely you can think of a few exceptions," he suggested slyly. Laughing, she walked over to kiss him. He balanced Harry on his hip and wrapped his free arm around her waist to draw her close to him.

She pushed him away after a few seconds, still laughing. "Not now," she said. "Put Harry to bed and come and have dinner. Then maybe afterwards, if you stop being such a pervert."

"I'm not perverted, _you're_ prudish," he retorted good-naturedly. But he let her get back to dinner and spent a few more minutes with Harry before putting him to bed and rejoining his wife in the kitchen. They had dinner together, sharing with one another the details of their day – his teaching position at Hogwarts, her experiences with Harry. He was often jealous that Lily got to spend so much time with him. He wanted Lily to move in with him at Hogwarts, but she was reluctant to have Harry growing up at the school. It would be hard enough for him to go there as the son of two heroes of the Wizarding war, she felt it was best that he wasn't exposed _too_ early to that kind of attention. And he had to admit, this place on the outskirts of Hogsmead Village was a charming place, far more so than even the homiest of rooms at Hogwarts. He knew he was a better man for having this place to come home to than the impersonality of the castle.

They had dinner and when everything was put away, Severus took her in his arms. "Harry's asleep. No more excuses," he said softly, although Lily wasn't so much making excuses as was indeed a little prudish when it came to marital relations with Harry around. He didn't mind, it was part of her more conservative side that he loved about her. Besides, it was a side of her personality that had driven James Potter bonkers in other ways, so who was he to argue with that? Lily allowed him to pick her up and carry her to the main bedroom, dropping her down with a surprising amount of grace, given he hadn't possessed a graceful bone in his body before they'd started seeing each other. He grinned to himself, remembering how it had only taken a few well-chosen remarks about Potter's finesse as a Quiddich player to get him to blood well _learn_ some grace. Well, that rivalry was well and truly over and Lily had long since come to the conclusion that things wouldn't have worked with James. She kept the odd track of him, he was doing well playing Quiddich professionally, but they weren't super-friendly and that was something he could tolerate.

He started kissing her in earnest, and she kissed him back, reaching under his shirt to run her hands the length of his back. Grunting, he bucked up against her. "Don't do that without warning me," he said.

"But if I warned you, it wouldn't be a surprise and you wouldn't react like that," she pointed out logically. "Hey, I didn't tell you to _stop_,." she said when she'd distracted him with his words into stopping. It was one of the first things she had discovered about him, he couldn't demonstrate passion and string together a coherent sentence at the same time. "You know, for a Potions Master, you _really_ suck at balancing instinct and reason."

"Don't hear you complaining," he grunted Then, "be quiet, you're distracting me." He started kissing her again, pushing his hands up under her shirt, feeling every inch of her skin, her abdomen, her stomach, her breasts. Lily arched her back and cried out his name, digging her nails into his back. From there, they undressed each other quickly so they were completely naked. He slid his hand between her thighs, slipping his fingers into her womanhood. She murmured approvingly and he picked up a strong message about him being damn good at certain subtleties even if he sucked at balancing instinct and reason. There were certain advantages of being a talented Legilimenist that many people didn't think of. Soon he had her well and truly ready for him. He positioned himself between her legs and took her hands in his at her sides, looking deep in her eyes. Those emerald green eyes that had enchanted him from the first day he had seen her all those years ago. She smiled up at him, a special, loving smile reserved only for him, and he didn't need to read her mind to know that she loved him and wanted him. He penetrated her as slowly as he could manage, which was difficult, given he didn't see her as much as he would have liked and always wanted her... He shuddered as he penetrated her fully, his erection fully emerged in her warm wetness. He began thrusting, and Lily met his thrusts. She wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled her hands out from under his so she could wrap them around his back, running them up and down the length of his back. "Sev, oh, Sev," she cried out frantically, and he could feel he coolness of her wedding ring against his skin...

Severus blinked back tears as he stroked himself to an unsatisfactory climax in the bedroom in the dump at Spinner's End. Unsatisfactory, because he could never totally believe in the life with Lily Evans that haunted his fantasies, as much as he wanted to. Because no matter how deeply he had been in love with her, he could never forget that she had chosen not to be friends anymore, and married James Potter, and had been murdered at the hands of Lord Voldermort because of something _he_ had done. "Lily, Lily," he cried out as he climaxed, wishing, like he had wished every day for the last five years, that he could take it all back and be the kind of man she could have loved back...


End file.
